September 2 (Thursday): Pinned. In general today is a slow start, I squeeze a little MSN with Sara but not much. This morning I come with a little gusto, to the point that I am singing Without Me by Eminem and emphasising the ME. I suffer some deflation though when Phoebe doesn't bother to reply to my email.

Today I am scheduled to have an interview with some company on the business park at 5.30. I get dressed up in my bests (white shirt, bright tie) and get pumped for the ordeal in the evening. Unfortunately early on in the day, Andy from Hays telephones me to tell me that the interview can't happen this evening. The interview gets rescheduled for tomorrow but now I can no longer wear my bests! That’s the problem with first impressions, you only get to make them once.

During the morning Melchard asks me how my last session last week went with the good doctor. I respond "not well" when I really I feel like rant and raving about how much I talked about work in, especially the detail in which I/we discussed our run in last week. Instead though, I'm a good guy, I whimper and do not rock the boat.

This is the morning though that I discover you can get Google on GPRS/WAP. Information ahoy. At lunchtime I wander around town aimlessly with Stevo, avoiding splashing out needlessly on eating out.

In the afternoon, I check my email for any sign of life from Phoebe and out of the blue, Bella randomly emails. We exchange a few emails and the old fluids get running. She asks me if I am ever on MSN ("am I ever!"). False hopes ahoy.

In the afternoon you find us chipping in for a present for Kurtney's wedding, the wedding the majority of the company/firm has not been invited but that is ok. However the collection is being joyfully done by someone (Jammin) that has been invited to the do, so you can kind of see why she has a vested interest in doing so.

On TV in the evening is a drama called The Hamburg Cell which is a fictionalised account of the story of one of the suicide bombers from September 11. It turns out to be really boring after promising so much and I eventually slip into distraction, with all my concentration going on MSN but really I cannot and do not see the point in trying to humanise such individuals. Regardless of their backgrounds and circumstances, these people still fucking hijacked and flew aeroplanes into the twin towers.

After a real evening, late on B pops up online and through MSN says “no time like the present�. We catch up for a bit and MSN well past midnight. Initially if feels fun but also laboured, this is walking on eggshells stuff. Nice to touch base though, even if it does feel like a complete waste of time and energy.

np: Eminem - Without Me