June 2 (wednesday): Another day another doughnut. Good start, Azmei gave me a lift into work after all and Lindsey wasn't around to fuck up our conversation. Lindsey looks bad, she's already a keep fit freak and now she's getting smaller and smaller (in a bad way) and absolutely worst of all, she still looks really sad, down and depressed for it, as if she's accomplishing something difficult only to realise it is an empty resolution/accomplishment. I haven't spoken to her since February now (elongated strop on my part) and I feel really bad about it, even worse now than when she blew me out back in February. Otherwise at work though it is a good day. I'm back on Acme Maintenance (another one of Who's started but not finished projects) and it goes well. Ivan seems to be acting as interpretor/middle man between me and Who these days, which is a less than ideal way to be but I just can't work with him when he (Who) has such a low opinion of my work. Stevo is about and as per the scheme of things were are going bollo at each other, hurling abuse and bitching eachother out. We argue about Lord Of The Rings for no reason. I text Phoebe and for a second day she gets back to me, texting laughs at me. She adds the most sense to the arguments with "how can you argue over that, there is only ONE ring". At lunchtime I stagger around town with Azmei for a bit but we've drifted now and are unlikely to ever recoup the great friendship we had six months ago now. Fun times continue back in the office though when I pick up the new issue of Maxim and it has a free whistle inside it. Everytime now Stevo pisses me off, I blow him off. This is officially my new rape whistle. Luckily he fucks off early afternoon and I'm left to finish Acme Maintenance in peaces.

At six we play a big league match in five-a-side against Birkett Long. Annoyingly Andrew phoned in early and laughed it off, leaving us a bit in the lurch but still we were fairly confident. There is a good atmosphere pre-match but soon it is revealed that we don't have much more than Ivan on for us tonight. And this with us having six players and them only five. We take a very early lead and things look immediately good but slowly they gradually roll up a good store, unfortunately seeing me let in, once more, too many soft goals. Just before half time we pull back to 5-6 and I'm already waving for half time. Unfortunately they get another and then disaster as Jeremy puts on through my legs for an own goal and then he gets stolen on the edge of the area and Jez thrashes one past me making it 9-5 at half time. I improve in the second half (wanker) but we barely score and eventually the game ends, not before time, at (at least) 14-6 to Birkett's. In order to win the league we really needed this one. Now, I guess we are in with a slight chance providing a good/big win against Anglia Grain but that's not really likely at all unfortunately.

Post match spirits were once more low again and I have to post Ebay sales and get groceries. I've restarted Atkins but it is all just shooting through me, so I am now back on cereal for breakfast, lunch and dinner. Cinnamon Grahams are currently doing football CD-ROMs so they're cool. I get in just past eight and manage to revise solidly.....until 8.30. I peruse the old tax papers and I soon clock that every paper has a VAT question and a waffle financial advice question, so there is some light of optimism suddenly showing (I must text Phoebe with this to help raise spirits elsewhere too). So my revision progress currently stands at: tax 12% audit 23% and overall 18%. I love it when a plan comes together.

np Johnny Thunders - You Can't Put Your Arms Around A Memory